A royal sickness and a public story

 

After all the conspiracy theories, when there was an announcement that the Princess is taking treatment for cancer, everyone took a step back from the poking and prodding.  

I just couldn't but help look back at how my family handled my diagnosis and treatment. The funny thing is actually there weren't much difference. They followed similar tack ticks. There was a big family event coming up and I was not going to be attending. My family went into over drive immediately planning and figuring out , what to tell, how to tell, when to tell and whom to tell. 

Initially they would confirm to anyone who asks that I was attending. As the date got close, they began to say "Maybe she might not attend as she might have to under go an operation. Waiting on doctors advice" By this time I had already had surgery and was on to chemo. On the day they just said that I couldn't get time off from work. 

I am not saying we are important like the Royal Family, just that any family will carve out a story for the outside world based on their perspective and the circumstances. My family's  initial justification is that they are protecting me. But I didn't mind people knowing that I was doing chemo. I am not the first person and I will not be the last. And it wasn't like I brought it on myself somehow by doing something. In my mind, if people knew I would be left alone and I didn't have to keep up appearances. But somehow they thought otherwise. 

So I went to my psychiatrist from the hospital and was given some very good pointers. Some of them were :

"Family is trying to protect me" : "Family is trying to protect themselves from questions "

"I don't mind talking to people about the treatment" : "People cannot be trusted to say the right thing"

"People will support me to relax if I tell them the truth" : "They might not stop asking questions and tiring you"

"I will tell close friends and family the truth" : "Have a public story that you are comfortable to share with everyone else"

Such wise words. I especially like the concept of a "public story" which contains just the bits of the treatment you are comfortable sharing. So now I have a public story that I share. It is not a lie, a half truth if you will. A story that has the bits and pieces that match with the timelines and the but one that you can deal with in public and prying eyes. 

I realized that's what the Royal family does too. We have maybe 50 people that we have to deal with but they have 5 billion. Still the same concept still the same idea. Because we are all human and its a human condition.